The resistance to praying is like the resistance of tightly clenched fists....
A first prayer, therefore, is often a painful prayer, because you discover you don't want to let go. You hold fast to what is familiar ....
When you dare to let go and surrender one of those many fears, your hand relaxes and your palms spread out in a gesture of receiving.
from Henri Nouwen, With Open Hands (1972), pp.14-17.
I didn't relax my hand nor spread out my palm out of my will. I couldn't hold onto the things that I wanted to control; they slipped through my fingers. Now that they're already on the ground, it's much easier to let God pick up the pieces. 人的盡頭,就是神的開頭.
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