Blessed Assurance, Jesus is mine!
O, what a foretaste of glory divine!
Heir of salvation, purchase of God,
Born of His Spirit, washed in His blood.
Perfect submission, all is at rest.
I in my Savior am happy and blest:
Watching and waiting, looking above,
Filled with His goodness,
Lost in His love.
This was a song that we sang to dad while he was in the hospital. It was a song that lifted my spirit time and time again in the last three months. The chorus goes:
This is my story, this is my song,
Praising my Savior all the day long.
I remembered thinking during the first week of dad's hospitalization - what is going to be my story? Would I arrive at the same conclusion as this hymn – one that sings praise and gives glory to His name?
It is true that the richness of life is measured by relationships. The picture could not have been more vivid during the last three months. Dad was so richly blessed in that regard as many have shown their concern and support. And during the last months, I have been touched by so many dear friends who have unceasingly lifted our family up in prayers. I have also been blessed by the brothers and sisters from my sister's church who sacrificially spared their time and assisted us in so many ways, like visiting dad, cooking meals, taking mom out when we couldn’t handle it, and standing by to help no matter what the needs are. These relationships, rooted in and transformed by our relationship with Christ, is the life that I have heard so much about, that we, as followers of Christ have been called to live - to do life together on this earth. Now I am a witness to this richness of life.
Over the past months, we prayed for dad's meaningful recovery, and asked God to spare us from making difficult decisions should the Lord choose to take him to his eternal home. There were times that I felt God was silent on all counts. Plenty of events took place that I didn't understand but in the end, and by His grace, I decided that the "why" is not as important as the "who." Based on His assurance, His unconditional loving act that Christ died for me on the cross and His faithfulness in my life, I find no better one to trust than our Lord and our savior. And especially toward the two weeks leading to dad's passing, when I felt that the darkness was closing in, when there was a voice asking "where is your God?"
What would be my response? What would be the conclusion of my story?
Lord, despite my perception of the circumstances ...
Still I will say, blessed be the name of the Lord,
Blessed be your name, blessed be your glorious name.
You give and take away, my heart will choose to say,
Lord, blessed be your name.
You are a good, merciful and loving God.
Your provision is sufficient for me.
I acknowledge your sovereignty over our lives.
Indeed, there is no other god like Jehovah.What is going to be your story?
This may be a sad occasion for us but it is a joyous occasion for dad. He is in his eternal home now for which our heavenly father has prepared. Sure we are sad about this temporary separation but I am so confident that my father is enjoying his new imperishable body, praising and worshiping the Lord with his friends and my grandmother in heaven. It is a good life. And our hope is in Christ.
Esther Tam, May 11, 2007
Closing my parents' safe deposit box at a local bank today, I sorted out their stuffs and found these two rings. Their names and the date they got married are marked at the inside of the rings.
Looking at these rings, I thought perhaps dad's getting a bigger crown for having stayed with mom, honoring their marriage vow than if he had gone off to China and even accomplished something huge for the local churches there.
I was trained to tithe as soon as I learned to use money. As a child, if I would be given $1 on Sunday; mom and dad would have me put 10 cents in the offering basket. 
